Momma Chelle's Musings: Remembering the Reason for the Season

Any of you with children in your household know that there is a thin line between falling victim to the commercialization and consumerism that has become the "focus" of Christmas and the true reason for the season - the celebration of the birth of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. As I go out and about trying to find that balance while making sure my little ones are happy come Christmas morning (and yes, I admit, I spoil them rotten), there are some observations about the holidays that I thought I'd share.

Drew and Dylan still believe in Santa Claus and that makes this a magical season all around. They've been talking for weeks about what Santa was bringing them. Dylan's been trying to be on his best behavior at school so Santa will still come. He even warns Drew that if he acts up Santa won't come. Nic has no clue about any of it but, in time, he will know the magic of Christmas too. Davon is already a jaded a teenager who knows the reality.

But the little ones have no idea that in our house Santa is a hard working mom who tries to give them the best I can. Part of this giving includes my participation in Black Friday sales. For many years I have participated in the annual shopping tradition on the day after Thanksgiving. It began several years back when I spent the Thanksgiving holiday with my sisters up in Frederick, MD. Dutchess and I ventured out early and braved the crowds to monopolize on some really good deals on toys at KB Toys and Toys R Us for Davon (I don't think I had all those other jokers then). Now I continue the tradition mostly out of tradition's sake and because you can really get some great deals. WalMart is usually my location of choice and I go with a good attitude ready to laugh at people . . . which you really can do daily (see http://www.peopleofwalmart.com/ if you aren't a believer).

You would be so surprised how crazy people get to spend their hard earned money (or increase their credit line) for a sale they think is only slotted for a few hours. It's amazing. Anyway, I head out with the mindset that I probably won't get what I really want so I'm not hugely disappointed if the discounted item is unavailable but it's a bonus if I can snag it. Davon benefitted with a $400 desktop computer a few years back and last year's big ticket item for him was a flat screen TV for less than $200. I can't yet reveal this year's deals because I don't want any of the snoopers in my house to get a sneak peek at their possible gifts but I did okay this year too.

I still just am amazed at the sheer ridiculousness that perfectly sane people can display during these doorbuster hours. I mean, really, what other time of the year do you see people fighting and arguing (and even dying, literally) to spend their own money? Last time I checked the WalMart was not in the business of giving away anything for FREE. But you slash the price on a flat screen TV and people lose their military minds. Which leads me back to the inspiration for this post anyway.

I think we all need to step back and reevaluate our motives during this time of year. Especially a year like this one - whether you want to admit it or not our economy has still not moved past the effects of the recent recession, many families are torn apart as a result of the now nine year WAR efforts in Iraq and Afghanistan, and the holiday season is statistically the time of year when many people feel there is no relief from or alternative to their pain and they commit suicide.

So really, what are we focusing on? What does it all really mean? Now for me, I do focus a bit on the commercialization of the holidays because I have small children. There's nothing like the look of wonder and happiness when a child sees something under a Christmas tree for them. And as a parent, I want my kids to have wonderful memories of their childhood and how happy they were when they got that special thing they really wanted from Santa Claus. So, yeah I do go a bit overboard. And, yeah, I do need to do a better job at striking a healthy balance between that happiness and the joy of the season because of our faith in a power higher than ourselves.

I had begun a tradition of making Davon spend some of his own money each holiday on a present for a child his age who was less fortunate than he is. One year, I even made the extra effort of getting Davon and Drew to pick out a gift for a less fortunate child (Dylan was just a baby) and I found a shelter. We all visited and I was able to put a face to that dilemma. We donated our items to a mother who had three young children (as I did at the time). I got the mom a little something too. I don't know if that gesture resonated with them or not (it definitely did affect me), but I think I need to reintroduce that exercise so that they can realize how fortunate they really are because I know that fact is often totally lost on them. Looks like another trip to the store is in my future. We can always find a Toys for Tots donation location although I really do think that personal visit to a shelter can be a very humbling experience.

So I end this post with a recommitment to making sure my kids know that Christmas isn't just about getting a bunch of material things. What's really important is letting the people we love know that we love them, sharing special family traditions and being together. But it's also important to keep in mind that there are many other people who don't have as much as we've been blessed with. And we are a community and as believers in a higher power that we call Jesus we should be more sensitive to what Christmas is really all about.

The reason for the season is not about finding the best deal on a flat screen TV or the newest electronic gadget, hot toy or video game system. We should look at this time of year as a time to truly count our blessings and try to be a blessing to someone who may need a reminder of the love of the Lord. We should try to put a little more of Christ back into CHRISTMAS. We will all be in a better position if we did so.

I leave you with a few of my favorite Christmas classics to help get you in the mood for the holidays

the incomparable Donny Hathaway with This Christmas